Sometimes there are days when I close myself off for the whole wide world.
Those days I feel worried and not so brave.
I flutter restlessly and uncertain.
Going to the run. Forever baby.
I drift away.
You pull me close.
You’re so good to me.
I know, but I can’t change.
I try to tell you,
in various sort of ways.
You see my softer side.
You see the light in me.
When it’s dark, I’m a bit of everything. Too much. Wandered. Lost.
I am chaos, I am love.
I make mistakes. I restore them. Too late. Too early. Gone. Love.
I’m not ashamed.
I’m your blindside, I’m your dream.
I’m nothing in between.
You know you wouldn’t want it any other way.
So take me as I am.
You will have to be a stronger man.
Rest assured when I start to make you angry, disappoint you and push your limits, again.
Tomorrow everything is better.
And today don’t mean a thing.
Just when you think you understand me, the season is already changing.
I find you so powerful, you do what you do.
Don’t try to save me.
I’m horny, I’m excruciating.
I am a goddess on my knees.
But when you’re grieving, when you’re hurting, when you suffer,
I’m your sunshine undercover.
Sometimes I feel numb, unlovable, alone, sometimes I feel reborn and I dare everything and so much more.
I can’t say I’m not alive.
You know I wouldn’t want it other way.
I am none of this all and everything all at once.
But as someone once said to me, oh no, wait, it didn’t go like that, like I once thought: “a passionate woman, is worth the chaos”.
All artwork by Puck Rietveld
The philosophy behind blogporn is not so much that it’s written by me, as being my own person, but from a pseudonym. An alter ego, so to speak. This has several advantages.
First, my writings (on the wall) are not linked to me as a person, I mean that people who read blogporn don’t make an association with me. To guarantee my anonymity for various reasons. On the other hand, I think it’s important that everyone (18+) may and can recognize themselves in blogporn. It could therefore in principle be written by everyone and at the same time for everyone. This is what it’s all about. I find that important.
I want to exhilarate, challenge, be vulnerable, be able to be, dare to(o), arouse curiosity and share, create togetherness or just stimulate time with yourself. I want you to smile in recognition, get warmed by desire, notice your body when you get horny, really feel and touch yourself and who knows the other person too. What you do before, during or after blogporn is your choice. A sort of everything is possible and everything is allowed story 😉
Now let’s go back to my alter ego, the pseudonym I choose to write under. I chose N/A. The literal translation of this is: Not Applicable. It also means Not Available and No Answer. And last but not least: